Welcome to Friday 411, issue #150. In 4 minutes, with 1 insight and 1 action, you’ll learn three ways your character shapes your leadership.
1 Insight
Your character shapes where you lead, how you lead, and who your people become.
A few weeks ago, we trained a group of 30 leaders for 3-1/2 days in Washington, DC. On the first afternoon, the group visited The National Holocaust Museum. If you’ve never been to that museum, it is harrowing. As soon as you step off the elevator, you’re confronted with an image of decimated, decaying bodies thrown into a pile. These precious human lives were treated like garbage.
The Holocaust Museum tells the story of Adolph Hitler’s rise to power and the devastating effects of his leadership, shaped by racism, blame and hatred.
The next day, we took the same group to the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. There, we watched the recording of Martin Luther King, Jr.’s I Have a Dream speech. We imagined ourselves in the crowd, hearing his words that envisioned a future without bigotry.
Both men’s lives, leadership, and legacy were shaped by their character. Your character is shaping your leadership right now, the same way theirs shaped the world.
Character Is Deeper than You Think
Most leaders nod along when someone says character matters. Of course it does. But few of us stop to consider just how deeply our character influences every part of our leadership.
Character goes beyond honesty and integrity for leaders. Those qualities are table stakes for being a decent human. If you’re going to lead greatly, you need even deeper character: a set of values and practices that shape how you lead others.
Your character shapes more than your ethical choices or whether or not people trust you. It affects everything about your leadership:
1. Where you lead.
If others are following you, you need to know where you’re going. In other words, you need to have a vision for the future you’re leading others toward. Your character shapes the future you pursue.
Hitler’s character led him to pursue a future that elevated one group of people at the expense of others. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s character shaped where he wanted to lead: a future where “all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual: ‘Free at last. Free at last. Thank God Almighty, we are free at last.’”
The future you lead people toward always starts with who you are on the inside.
2. How you lead.
Your character shows up in every conversation, every decision, and every reaction your team sees from you.
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If you believe you’re the smartest person in the room, you won’t listen to other people’s ideas.
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If your highest aim is getting people to like you, you won’t have the hard conversations when it’s necessary.
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If you never want to look bad, you’ll blame others for your mistakes rather than owning them.
But character doesn’t only show up in the bad habits. It shows up in the good ones, too. We know a leader named Shane. Each day, on his commute home, he calls a couple of his direct reports. He’s not checking on tasks or metrics. He wants to hear about their days, their lives, their struggles, their dreams. He asks if there’s any area of their lives (not just work) where they feel stuck or need help.
Shane’s team knows exactly who he is. The question is: does yours?
3. How you shape those you lead.
Character doesn’t just affect how you treat people. It affects who they become.
Dan, a VP of operations, was one of the most well-liked people in the building. Honest and generous, everyone on his team trusted his intentions. But Dan had one blind spot. He wanted people to like him, so he avoided conflict.
Karen, one of Dan’s direct reports, was part of the Leadership Team. She acted territorial, spoke negatively about any ideas but her own, and resisted change. Every time a tough conversation came up in a Leadership Team meeting, Karen would stand her ground with the dissenting voice. If Dan challenged her, she would start crying. Unsure of what to do, Dan would table the discussion and say, “Let’s revisit this decision later.” But he never would.
Over time, the rest of the team grew frustrated. They knew Karen held the power. They knew Dan wouldn’t address her behaviors because he wanted so badly to be liked that he failed to lead. His avoidance gave Karen more room to manipulate with each interaction. His character also shaped the rest of the team who wouldn’t bring hard topics to Dan to avoid him feeling slighted.
Ultimately, a lot of people disengaged, and a few people left because work wouldn’t move forward.
Dan was a good man. But his unwillingness to engage in the necessary conflict shaped Karen and the rest of his team in ways he didn’t intend.
That’s the weight of character as a leader. You are shaping people whether you realize it or not.
Character Isn’t Fixed
Your character has plasticity. It isn’t fixed. It can be developed through practice.
Here are ways that you can develop your character:
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Act with humility. Think of others and treat others as being better than you.
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Shine the spotlight on others. Highlight the contributions of others for their effort and the results.
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Take ownership. Accept responsibility when things don’t go well for your team— even if you didn’t directly cause them.
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Handle the hard things. Don’t be like Dan. Engage in the hard conversations, decisions, and actions that leadership requires.
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Love others. There is no greater force in leadership than your love of people. When you love them, you will want what is best for them.
The need for leaders to grow in character is one of the reasons we built the Unleashed Community. It’s a place where leaders like you come together to grow in the areas that matter most, with real training, real conversations, and real accountability. If you’ve been reading these Friday 411s and thinking, “I want to actually work on this stuff,” this is your next step.
1 Action
Pick one of those five. The one that made you uncomfortable when you read it? That’s probably the one. Focus on it this week.